Post 4: Brought to you by Tom Sellack's sexy sexy chest hair

Tom thinks I should stay on the steroids FOREVER. I love you Tom, you sexy beast man.

Oh Google. My favorite part about this picture is that Tom (we're tight) apprears to not be holding an old school cell phone, but a regular phone that has just been unplugged from the wall.
So......tick tock! What's that sound? The sound of IT'S TIME TO START TAPERING OFF OF STERIODS. ugh. I would be lying if I said I wasn't concerned about tapering down-the steroids have....worked. On Monday I will start taking two pills instead of three. And then next month, one pill instead of two. What happens during this process will determine my next steps. I am really, really trying to avoid taking what I refer to as the "super scary cancer drug," which in reality is just an immunosuppresent. With an increased risk of developing cancer.

What is super frustrating to me is that there is really no good way to determine what's going on up in my digestive business. Sure, the symptoms are better, but, as the stupid drugs ads remind me on TV, am I still subject to DAMAMGING INFLAMMATION (cue horror movie music)? Apparently, it is possible to be asymptomatic and still have bad things happening in your colon, which is the rationale for going on the scary drug, which just kind of puts a damper on whole "your immune system attacking itself" thing. I really wish that there was a little porthole on my side, so I could peek in and determine the state of things.


So as I taper, I'm going to add in some vitamins/supplemants and go off of white flour/white sugar. I went to a naturopath (who is supposed to be THE GUY for IBD patients in my town) who wanted me to do the SCD (specific carbohydrate diet). Like the good little soldier that I am, I promptly bought the book and several cookbooks that rely heavily on almond flower. I read through it, and I don't think it's for me. Maybe it's my distaste for this particular naturopath (again, another post!), maybe it's my general disbelief in anything promising to "fix" or "heal" a chronic condition, or maybe it's just my reluctance to eat bone marrow and make my own cheese, but the whole process seems unsustainable for me. However, avoiding the white stuff seems doable and healthy and might help wean me off of bread, which is like my crutch in this whole shit storm. There were months where I was living entirely off of white bread, hummus, and lemonade gatorade (yum!). They are my security blanket and culinary happy place.

I'm going to try adding in some new foods and TRY to bust out the (cooked) fruits and vegetables. Granted, if my symptoms come back, I might curl up into the fetal position with a dozen bagels and a 15 lb. bag of white sugar, but I'll give it a try. That seems to be all I can do as I look forward to the next few weeks: try something new, see what happens, wait and see, adjust accordingly.

I hate uncertainty.